Bang Bang!

Well, that was fun. This is a shiny, over-the-top remake of some random Hollywood movie that I haven’t seen anyway, so I can’t really bring myself to care that’s it’s not original. Originality is not what I’m looking for, which is good because Bang Bang! stars Hrithik Roshan as a dangerous yet sexy criminal, Katrina Kaif as carefree young woman caught up in international adventures, and Hrithik’s hair gel as an indestructible force of nature.

Harleen is a bank receptionist living in Shimla with her spunky Dadi, dreaming of far-off places and wearing very appealing knitwear. Rajveer has stolen the Kohinoor diamond for an angry crime lord who wants to disrupt India/British relations, but demands more money and is pursued across the rooftops of Shimla by henchmen. He easily escapes, because he can jump from the highest buildings and come out with nothing more than stylishly ripped jeans. Harleen meets him when he’s mistaken as her blind date, but when she’s seen with him, she also becomes a target for the crime lord and is whisked away for more fights, more intrigue, and attractive international location songs.

Harleen is a very enjoyable protagonist, and Katrina is as cute as can be:

I assume this is what they were going for at the end of Ishq Shava, with the carefree attitude and miniskirts, but this actually works and I love it. With this and Dhoom 3, I'm now firmly on team Katrina. Plus, the songs are Harleen’s fantasies, not Rajveer’s, and while he’s unquestionably the hero, the story follows her instead.

The plot doesn’t actually make sense, but there is a scene with Hrithik fighting in the ocean with little jetpacks attached to his feet. Also one where he shoots a plane with a harpoon gun, then uses it to water ski and catch up with the plane. And there are these great shots from Harleen’s perspective with Hrithik all oiled up and posing like he’s on a romance novel cover. The point is, I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of this movie, and I left hoping that Harleen takes her Dadi on their next around the world adventure. She’d like it.

Mujhse Dosti Karoge! (2001)

Oh, Mujhse Dosti Karoge. So much unnecessary melodrama all wrapped in candyfloss and served up with silly songs and well-timed divine intervention. And sometimes, that’s exactly what I want, so I watch MDK again. It’s a love story about some friends who have some very questionable notions about friendship and also fashion choices. (Sometimes I wonder what I would have thought about this movie back in 2001. Would I have been too cool for this sort of thing, or would I have loved Kareena’s fantastic pants?)

Raj

Best friends Tina and Pooja

The scene is set with three young friends. Raj is leaving for London, and saying goodbye to Pooja and Tina in Shimla. Raj has a not-so-secret crush on Tina, and Pooja has a not-so-secret crush on Raj. They promise to stay in touch, but when Pooja emails Raj, she signs it “Tina” to ensure a response. They continue their correspondence, and years later, when they’ve grown up, Raj and Pooja (who Raj thinks is Tina) have fallen in love over email. Raj has grown up to be Hrithik Roshan, Tina has grown into bubbly, hyper-fashionable Kareena Kapoor, and Pooja is quiet and sweet Rani Mukherjee. She’s supposed to be the plain one, but you can stuff her in all the dowdy turtlenecks you want, she’s still Rani. Also her outfits have aged a little better than Kareena’s.

Kaho Naa... Pyaar Hai (2000)

Such Bollywood. Very Hrithik. So melodrama. Wow.

(“Say you love me”) So this is the movie that Rakesh Roshan made to launch his son’s career. This is the superhit that launched Hrithik to stardom. It’s not bad, actually. I mean, the plot makes it the sort of movie you’d show people if you wanted to confirm all their stereotypes of Bollywood, but the ridiculous situations, people falling in love for no discernable reason, criminals with the collective intelligence of boiled cabbage and Hrithik’s flashy dance moves are just what I like. I enjoyed it far more than I was planning to. There’s silliness and warm fuzzies, the songs are catchy, and the commitment to emotional drama, regardless of logic, is impressive.

Our fresh-faced young hero

The soft-focus heroine

Rohit (Hrithik Roshan) is an honest, cheerful fellow who supports himself and his orphaned brother. He meets Sonia (Ameesha Patel) and lectures her into a dupatta within the first 15 minutes of the movie, which has to be some kind of record. They fall in love when Rohit is hired as a musician on a cruise to Singapore.Through a series of drunk coincidences, they’re stranded on an idyllic deserted island together for some first-class frolicking.